Machines of Loving Grace

It has been a week of computer challanges. I have managed a new computer, after too many oddities to deal with in the last. But this did not solve the problem, it has somehow transferred these oddities to the new computer. I like to think it must be me, not quite able to accept the modern world and its ways. But most likely, it is just computers, manmade and faulty and a sign of the times.

But, as with most things, this will pass and computer bliss is on its way soon, when all works right, my words fall from my mind just right on the page, and when clicking the publish button actually publishes the post, not makes it disappear into oblivion.


All Watched Over by Machines of Loving Grace
by Richard Brautigan 1968

I like to think (and the sooner the better!)
of a cybernetic meadow
where mammals and computers live together
in mutually programming harmony
like pure water touching clear sky.
I like to think (right now please!)
of a cybernetic forest filled with pines and electronics
where deer stroll peacefully past computers as if they were flowers with spinning blossoms.
I like to think (it has to be!)
of a cybernetic ecology
where we are free of our labors and joined back to nature,
returned to our mammal brothers and sisters,
and all watched over by machines of loving grace


A very interesting man that wrote this. Here is a few links to sites about him.
http://www.rooknet.com/beatpage/writers/brautigan.html
http://www.litkicks.com/BeatPages/page.jsp?what=RichardBrautigan

I like Sundays

Mexico is predicted to have more economic growth next year than its richer than anyone nation next door. It is hard to figure out what poor is suppose to mean. I thought if you made more, you were richer. But, as every good American mistakenly knows, Mexico is poor, dirt poor. Why else would its people come across their borders seeking work. But, of course, this makes Mexico richer, the flow of easy American money. Americans would go next door to work too if they heard the wages were higher. Just like they send so much of the everyday work to other countries to do for them, it makes more money. Seems like everyone is doing the same, going to where it makes you the most. Or, at least everyone that was not satisfied with what they had and had to do something else.

I think sometimes Americans picture a deserted Mexico, with all its workers over on their side, taking their unwanted jobs. But, to the contrary, this is a nation full of hard working people, with only a small percent making that sad trip. But there is more migrants than ever before, this is true, now that America has tipped so many balances and made the time on end lifestyle here unkeepable. America is the bringer of so much destruction in so many ways. Its not just their bombs and bullets that threaten humanity but their mentality. A nation of evil doers for the sake of getting what they think they want most. The American dream, their right.

And sitting here in Mexico surrounded by the so labeled poor, life fits so well. Making do, content, happy and not worrying. Life is so very good. How can these Americans sleep at night knowing they participate in this mass evil of their killer nation and its out of control rulers? A sick nation in its death throes, trying to bring all down around it in the name of their disease, greed, at its extreme. It is a chilling thought that such a place exists, the never ending conquest to harness the masses for use by the few, combined with the modern technology and modern brainwashing to do so. Perfect timing, and they are going for it first and fastest, like they were invented for it.

But it is Sunday, so I will leave my thoughts of such an ugly place here and just go on with my day like none of it exist. My husband is expected home any moment, with fresh baked rolls and, avacados. I have the papaya and tangelos all ready. Now just to boil a stick of cinnamon in the water for the coffee and all should be just right. Its so quiet here Sundays, you can feel it. Peace is the word that comes to mind.

The fields below

It's this extra dimension to existence that exists nowhere, that I can pinpoint, that I balance my life out with for the sake of being aware. Cyber Space. One more frontier. Maybe some day it will become more real than real. "But do you really know him? No, I have only met him in person". My computer world is all scattered right now, due to a break down and the welcome miracle of a new computer. But not all has fallen back in its familiar colors and places and more changes are yet to come. So I wait to gather it back up again and put my own order to it.

I wonder why when its so easy and good not to hear the news, why soon I will return to it. One time, for about 15 years, I almost heard nothing of the outside world. Even missed some of Americas continuous wars. What does it have to do with my life here in Mexico where one rarely feels the waves of the worlds events. For some, the truth is quite an addicting thing, the only thing that can really satisfy, good, bad or indifferent. I think that is why, when I could be safe in my mind from the worlds evil that America heads up, I come here to spend some of my day searching and learning that truth. But, what can I do with it? I have this feeling though, like water, truth spreads wherever it touches. And that truths, linked together with others truths, become stronger.

I feel clean and good. Contributing to America is one of the eviler things a person can do. And if you live there, that is what you do. Any good a person says they are doing within is just an illusion, all contributing to the lie of America. If help was to have worked, it would have long ago. All signs say it is on its way out in a very ugly and disgraceful manner. I feel good because I purposefully do not live in that country, even if it is the one most suited to making money and sustaining a lifestyle that all to many feel is where success is at. The goodness of living poor and simple in Mexico has manifested so much that I feel rich without money. What more could I want, than what I have. Except for perhaps a proper behaving computer.

Remembering a Zapatista slogan, Like the dews in the mountain tops, truth will trickle down to water the fields below.

Admiration

I saw another view of Mexico last night. For months now my husband has been working on remodeling an office building into a three room skin therapy clinic. His work was recommended to the woman doctor by my husbands business partner, the vet. And since this is a trusting circle of friends she told my husband to spend whatever was necessary to make it look professional and appealing. It just was finished yesterday, in time for last nights grand opening. All in pinks and shades of lavender and creams. Tile and glass bricks. Like something out of a cosmetic ladies dream. Certainly not my reality, where life is simple and unnecessity not a necessity. But still very beautiful, in that way.

A ways into this project more was revealed about the young doctor. We were wrong to think she was from a rich family, as often is the case here, and that they were backing her. She came to this state, Baja California, when she graduated. Her husband and mother worked to put her through school. She made a success here with a clinic in a small hospital. Then they sold the ranch in Guadalajara. And with careful planning it enabled her to rent an office in the most popular area, which is used by well to do and progressive Mexican women. Hussongs Plaza, the place to say you have been to.

My husband admires those who have made their own way, out of the little they started with. So he decided that he would go way beyond the work she asked for. He told me if she was going to make it with clientele like that it would have to be an extra special job. It was like a hobby for him, making each aspect its most. It seems so almost silly, a skin clinic and its perfection, in all that goes on in life that counts so much more in the scheme of things. But then again, it is one persons life and my husband just made hers greatly enhanced. These things make him feel so good. He has admitted, he spent much of his wages from her on materials that complimented the work done, not the on sale ones she wanted.

So here we are again, another job done and still wondering where to get the money to live daily life with and wondering where the next money will come from. It feels real good, its always been this way. And sitting there last night in the plaza patio with more then 50 people, drinking heavy red wine and mango margaritas listening to new age music watching a full skin treatment and body massage on a white lounge chair on the dance floor I realized once again how many sides of Mexico there are. Not just the rough and tumble easy living one I knew for so many years. But this is Mexico too, changed and modern. This is not me though, or my world, it was just a very brief glimpse and a good one. Great people, positive, well dressed, polite and fun loving. The doctoras evening was a total success. Her mother, husband and two sons, standing with her. It is so good to know if one wants to, they can do just as they planned. My admiration to her. And Mexico, for keeping its balance and being a country where life is so good.

No Running

Now, I have just read that American playgrounds are putting up signs that say, "No Running", for the safety of the children playing there. How far can one paranoid self indulged nation take itself? I suppose to extremes, is the answer. Judging from their American taste for extreme and what they think that might imply.But I also noticed the words No Running because it made me think of other things. I think that's what I have been saying to myself, no running. My life is scattered about my small piece of land. House one place, the office another, one shop over by my mothers little house and the laundry room. The secret garden and the vegetable garden. And out towards the view the dog yards and the park and little orchard. The guest house and then some more shops, or tallers as they are called here. Its a lot to make the rounds of, checking this and that, finding looking, working, watching. I always wanted my small world to look in on itself with a fence around it, all contained and having what I need to make my life full. So this is it, it happened. But it is a lot of walking. I think, what if I were like the rich, a house so big if I forgot one of my shoes it might take me a real long search of a mansion to see where it got lost. One might have to start running, just to cut the time down for those types of disruptions to the flow of having it all. But anyway, to get back where I started, I have decided even if life keeps growing so well, for safeties sake, I'm not going to be running either. Every time I do, the dogs keep thinking its a game and gang up on me. That is one of the problems of a dog pack.Life should be slow.

Got English?

I have stolen johnny patriots post from out of my emails today. A little view into where the American mind is heading. Here it is, in whole:"The Catholic church was a sinking ship. Then they embraced the Mexicans living here. I do not attend church anymore. My church started the two language service. Call me intolerant but English has always been the language of my church and of America and suddenly they want to do both English and Spanish. I guess I am intolerant! I am now a man without a church and a political party. Soon, if the powers to be have their way, I will be without a country. Got English?"As though America came tumbling out of creation speaking English and is meant to stay that way forever. In a nation that arranges the world for their use, there is such intolerance of change within their own. How have these government pampered people come to the conclusion because people migrate north to work, as they always have and will, that all is lost for them, their country ruined and their lives threatened.This is what their government wants, turmoil, mistrust, fear, anger, hate, and their all time favorite, terrorism. All within their own bounds. A weak and fragmented populace. Now to even mention the loss of their so loved church because of the language of the invaders being used. Stripped of all they were taught that what made them American. Now they are lost. Lost and so vulnerable, ripe, for their government to finish the take over of what once was the American dream. The unaccomplished dream, now dead and replaced by a very evil and dangerous government that threatens the whole world.But that is America, and one must be careful not to let it overshadow their own world if they do not live there. Which I don't. I am right here in Mexico, not far at all across that border, but worlds away. And it is my own world here that I have created, with my husband, that is my strenght and freedom. It is so very important to feel right in how you live, day to day.And for me, today has been a good one, once again. Even if I know so much of the world suffers and problems mount by the minute.

How to settle down to it

It seems so hard to write in one place, when it is meant for another, the leaps of cyberspace are so hard to grasp, so far from pen and paper. But soon this post will appear on my new blog and take its permanent home there. Its something I have thought about ever since first finding the computer to open to the world. Telling it, the world, who I am and how I live. What I say is one thing, and I say much, but so can anyone. It is how we are that has the real meaning to it. Like how could anyone ever feel good about themselves choosing to stay in a country as criminally insane as America and be part of it in any way. They can stage their acts of opposing and protestations, but they still live the life and support the country. Every time I stop and think about that I am writing for my blog, strange word that it is, it sets me back a little and my thoughts scatter. How delicate a task it can be to catch these things and set them down right. But for now, I am content, this making of my blog feels like progress. I wonder how long it will take to feel at home on it. For now, enough.

where did it go

everything just keeps disappearing, or never appearing in the first place.